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Chapter 5 Part 2 – Those who take over

It hurts. Ah it hurts.

Ithurtsithurtsithurtsithurts!

My back, it burns. 

An overwhelming heat is coming from his palms pressed against my back, and burns my skin with a sizzling sound.

My back squirmed in pain, but I’m unable to escape his grasp on my neck and thigh. 

Involuntarily, my body convulsed as if to divert my attention from the pain, but even that did nothing to stop it from coursing in my back.

「――――――――――uu！―――――――――――――――――――uu！！！」

「Now you match with your precious 【Onii-sama】, and no longer belong to the Luzilles.」

A scream keeps trying to rise from my throat, but it won’t come out.* (original text said I couldn’t hear it)

I heard Otou-sama saying something, but my mind couldn’t process any of its meaning.

All of my sensations are overwritten into pain in my back.

「After this…..well, whether you live or die, depends on you now.」

“Best of luck to you, oh daughter of mine.”

Those words of his, sounded so far off in the distance.

My consciousness numbed by the terrible pain of being burned is slowly coming back, along with my other senses. I realized that there were sounds of commotion outside, and a moan escapes me as the shaking of the floor is irritating my wounds to stinging again.

Muted breaths come from my throat and a bloody taste covers my mouth from where I got cut earlier.

I opened my eyes with difficulty, and with tears forming in them, my vision became so distorted that I could barely see anything.

But even I could feel the number of people inside this room increasing.

「We….were summoned here, I hope you understand what this means.」

There was no other sound after that.*(original text said no sound came back)

My hearing is so overwhelmed by the pain that I wasn’t able to pick them up accurately.

My mind is not recognizing them.

I can’t even decipher what they were saying.

「Because she was resisting….she got burned. Bite*…how hateful.」*(i have no idea what 噛み付く mean in this context sorry, anyone who knows pls let me know in the comment section!)

「That’s…not it!」

I feel the bindings in my body being lifted. 

However, me being able to move is another question. *(original text said smth like “i can’t feel my body moving, even a little”)

As I desperately tried to shift my gaze into the sky, I spotted a familiar color, and I was automatically drawn to it, and felt as if I was gazing straight to Otou-saama’s rust colored eyes.

His eyes were narrowed, and for some reason, felt like they were mocking me silently.

「What are you so confused about? I am the head of the family you know.」

How many years has it been since I heard him talking like this; his tone so cold and overwhelming.

The voice of a cruel and heartless head.

An emotionless and fathomless voice. 

The room instantly went silent, and the only sound in the room was my ragged breathing.

Everyone’s gaze is focused on me―――on my back.

By instinct, my body tried to squirm and hide my back, and in return a scream rose from my throat as the pain tugged at my back.

What did he just say?

What the hell did you burn on my back?

……no way..!

I…All this guilt…I should be the one to carry them all.

My sins, my guilt, all of it. Only he has the right to judge me.

But, contrary to my impatience, my withered throat is unable to utter anything.

Just a little gasp, a little breath, sends a stabbing pain in my back all throughout my entire body.

I really should have killed him back then.

Someone in the room uttered something, and like a ripple in a calm lake, everyone opened their mouths to say something in agreement.

“It’s no use if the ritual is not followed to the tee. After all, we just witnessed it.” A voice resonated in the room.

A clan member burning the body of the head.

This act is a ritual.

A ritual where the old head is overthrown via burning by a member, and will be established as the new head.

Then the brand on my back is that of a loser―― if I am branded with this, only death awaits me.

And as expected, excited jeers and cheers shook the room as they excitedly sentenced me to death,and urged that I be killed immediately.

“It doesn’t matter whether you’re royalty or not. The law is the law”. Their shouting gradually shifted from my death sentence, to having complaints against the royalty, whom they were supposed to serve.

But a chilly voice cut them off, saying “I will not put this woman, who had abandoned her clan, in the grave made for clan leaders for generations to come”

「She’s already at death’s door. In this cold, those poor wild beasts would have a hard time hunting. Be helpful for once and help fill up their stomachs will you? Keika? Go dump this trash outside.」

「I will see to it my lord.」

I wonder how long I’ve been here.

Away from the excitement filled house, I was hauled by my arms by Keika, and carried me outside.

As I walked through the door, the world outside was slowly being filled with snow; I could feel the coldness of the air as it touched my bare skin, as if to cool down my feverish shoulders.

The sudden cold weather made me cough, causing me to curl up in pain caused by the burns being agitated on my back.

But Keika didn’t have the time to care about the pain I’m feeling. She just put more of my weight on her side so she can support me while walking.

Behind us, are cheering and congratulatory noises praising my father’s name.

oops I posted this too long kek, gonna work on part 3 so i can post it soon. I’m translating and reading as I go so i won’t know the story (:

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Chapter 5 – Part 1 – Those who take over

Watching me tremble continuously, Otou-sama spurned how disgusting my life has been.

Me being born at the cost of cutting Okaa-sama’s life short, me trampling over other people’s lives and feelings, the selfishness of it all, living a life for myself, and him pointing out that I am unsteadily protecting my own heart.

I didn’t want to hear these words.

And yet, Otou-sama cut off his words and looked away to take a deep breath to calm his emotions.*(original is something like free up)

「Don’t ever forget. Regardless of what kind of being you are, she loved you unconditionally. The last thing she wanted from me was for me to save you. …You are alive right now because someone wanted you to be.」

What even is this?

I’m alive, so what?

I am a character whose life’s only purpose is to be killed by Gil-sama.

Me being loved by Okaa-sama is a lie.

What does he even mean by those words?

There’s no way I’d believe someone like him who used his only child as a pawn in order to run away protecting his little life――However, using Gil-sama like this, the fruit sure doesn’t fall far from the tree huh.

I can hear a voice in my head chastising me for still trying to act like【Olga】.

I was about to cover my ears, thinking “I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want to think about it” when a reserved voice reached my ears.

「Master, it seems that everyone in the rescue team has left the main residence.」

I hurriedly looked for the source of that voice and before I knew it, a person covered in black appeared.

In this room where all sources of light have been extinguished, it’s hard to see this person’s countenance. But, this voice clearly belongs to Keika.

「How about the people monitoring us?」

「It’s almost time for them to change shifts so I will lead the way. I will light up a signal when the time is right.」

「Gather as many people as you can.」

Acknowledging in a stiff voice, Keika quietly left the room but did not utter a single word towards me.

I know she sided with Otou-sama but, what are they talking about? 

For what purpose are they gathering people?

Kuh――I was trying to stand up with all the strength I can muster, but I ended up being hit on the shoulder by Otou-sama, and rolled on the floor.

「And here I was thinking I can finally catch a break from everything. Once again, I have to get my hands dirty. How troublesome.」

「…ugh――kuh」

I have no idea what Otou-sama meant by mutterting the words “Oh well, a promise is a promise” to himself, but he suddenly held me by the throat and stomped on my thigh as I was struggling to get up.

His hold on my throat doesn’t hurt, however, the pressure he’s putting on my thighs are making them unbearably heavy.

I was about to cry out but I froze when I felt a tug on my dress and the sounds of clothes being torn off.

A stifled laugh rang out behind me when he noticed that I had stopped moving.

「You don’t need to be so wary around me. I’m not the kind of person who lays a hand on their own daughter, you know. I’m just taking advantage of their proposal. For now, why don’t we leave some proof of our “hard work” so we can talk our way out of this mess later, what do you say?」

“They’re staying away from the main residence so they won’t arouse suspicion from those who want to get rid of you” Otou-sama said cheerfully.

If he’s just taking advantage of their offer to him like he says, then as expected, his purpose in coming here is to kill me……!

I can’t die in a place like this.

I don’t….want to get killed yet.

If I die here, everything I’ve done will be in vain.

My death should be more meaningful than this.

「You killed a little too many people. It would’ve been easy to cover up if that wasn’t the case, but it already garnered too much attention. You reap what you sow, so stay put alright?」

I tried to resist, but my thigh that was held down by his foot would not move an inch, and I can’t raise my upper body because of his grip on my neck. 

But still, I tried to move away, but he put more weight on his hold and a sigh fell on my ears from above.

「Those kids are preoccupied with playing with the others, we only have this one chance right now. It’s gonna be a bit violent but she will have to forgive me for now.」

「…What…was…that…?」

I tried to move my hand, but I couldn’t reach Otou-sama while facing down.

Other people?(dad calls the allies, kids, refer to dialog) Did they manage to get help?

It was hard for me to breathe out, but somehow I managed to speak, Otou-sama’s awfully calm voice reached my ears.

“Speaking of which…” he said.

「Do you recall what you blurted out at my funeral? You were jealous, you said you were envious of her.」

「That…was…」

「You said it. It’s my beloved daughter’s wish, how could I forget?」

Otou-sama laughed and said “my awfully wretched daughter” 

「I’ll kill you as you wish.」

Before the words could reach my ears and make sense,  I felt a hand on my back and―――――――everything went blank.

「UWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!」

Someone said I update too irregularly. Please do note that I am doing this for my own enjoyment and learning purposes. I am not doing this for monetary gain( the ads are wordpress ads) nor am i doing this to gain popularity. I’m just doing this to study japanese more :v anyway, will try to finish another part probably until november cause this was just a burst of motivation, which was unfortunately killed earlier. Peace out~

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Chapter 4 – Those who confess – Part 3

Did you expect me posting this chapter 3 days in a row? did ya? huh? I didn’t 😀 Enjoy~ I might be gone again for a few weeks if my motivation to translate the next part dwindles.

===========================================

「 “Did you enjoy yourself? Trampling on everyone, not caring nor trusting them, and shutting yourself off? Did you enjoy your tragic little play and your role? My tragic heroine of a daughter?”」

I faced the direction where the voice was coming from, and saw otou-sama just standing there, with an expressionless face.

Was I really stupid?

Did I really act like a tragic heroine?

What the hell is he even talking about?

My mind screams out protests and resistance, and my whole body begins to tremble.

I don’t fear being violated, what I fear the most is being stared at by those bronze-colored eyes resembling mine―― but, why?

「 “You weren’t working for the sake of the sorcerers, you were just deluding yourself while satisfying your desires. That has always been the reason right?”」

I was afraid of being exposed, huh.

He who has accurately read the【Me】who is wearing a body called 【Olga】is frightening.

Facing the fact that I can’t even play the role of being the “Hellfire Princess” is making me fearful as well.

I didn’t really care nor concern myself with the sorcerers like【Olga】.

I did not truly trust the members of my clan.

Nor have I wholeheartedly stayed loyal to His Highness.

But.

「 “Tell me, you’ve never truly seen these people as humans――  have you?”」

Not caring about how many perishes.

Not caring how many cry.

Not caring how many fall to despair.

It doesn’t concern me.

Because that’s the role you all play in this story.

They aren’t humans―― They are simply characters in this story.

「 “The only person in your eyes and heart is Guilford. You don’t even acknowledge the existence of that Harvester kid whom you call your friend.”」

And what’s wrong with that?

What’s wrong with putting Gil-sama as my priority before the citizens of this country? the sorcerers? the members of the clan? Or my friends? or myself ?

What’s wrong with putting Gil-sama on a pedestal and making him my priority? Nothing matters more. Even the citizens of this country, or the sorcerers, or my friends, and especially myself. Nothing.

The refutes I have been holding back inside my mind began to move my mouth, as if to scold my trembling body.

Although reason dictates that I do not agree with what he said, I couldn’t help but be swayed by my emotions.

「 “…..That’s right. Yes, I love Onii-sama. I respect him, I adore him, I want to give him all the happiness in this world and I will do whatever it takes to provide him with such. I could care less about what happens to anyone else. As long as he’s happy. So what’s wrong with that? Could you blame me? I don’t care how much I needed to sacrifice, all of it has nothing to do with me. Everything and everyone else in this world exists only for my Onii-sama! ”」

Yes, they have to be.

「 “Why are you so obsessed with him?”」

――Because I have to be.

「 “You’re a pure liar at every turn aren’t you?”」

I’m not lying.

What I said is the truth.

The novel――The story, everything. They all exist for Gil-sama and Gil-sama alone.

The children, adults, the men and women, the sorcerers and regular citizens, supporting characters, the villains, and even me.

We all are characters that exist solely for Gil-sama.

「 “If only you had meant what you just said, I wouldn’t have said anything and would have given you an applause.”」

「 “……..”」

I mean it. Every word of it.

That’s all I have been thinking.

The story about Gil-sama’s growth, saving his country and the liberation of the sorcerers.

I’ve always loved this story, and I’ve always been the only character who loved Gil-sama the most.

「 “You? Wanting to protect Guilford? Don’t make me laugh. I know your gaze towards him is not one of brotherly love you claim to have. Did you try looking at yourself in the mirror with that gaze? Your――”」

I love him.

The absolute main hero character.(yeah, i don’t know how to do those text on top like the japanese one.)

The knight in shining armor.(original text said 正義の味方を-seigi no mikata wo,  but i don’t want this to have the Shirou from FSN feel lol)

An existence to be admired for.

The only one who encouraged and gave hope to the me who is lying sickly on a hospital bed waiting to die. The only reason for that “me”, to be happy.

The only existence that made me feel like I wasn’t alone.

「 “…Stop…it..”」

But that’s how I always thought of it.

I’m not a villain, I don’t want to be hated and excluded by everyone. 

The truth is――

「 “You actually hate Guilford more than anyone, don’t you.”」(Ngl im crying as i type that line.)

I wanted to be Onii the hero sama.

「 “…You’re…wrong..”」

No one cared for me, no one did anything for me. The only person I longed for was Gil-sama, even as I was dying alone in the hospital bed.

I wanted to be the one to think of my friends, my country. And more than that, I wanted to be the one to be loved and cared for by many people, who can laugh and cry freely, one who can freely play without care, and lastly, become the hero for everyone.

The hero of the story, ever so brightly shining.

A person, more important than everyone. (lol poor king)

「 “…You’re…wrong..That’s not….Onii-sama――”」

And yet,

Why do I have to be born as a villain?

Why do I have to be the one who can’t protect her loved ones?

Why do I have to be in a role where everyone hates me?

And yet, why do I have to love this story so much?

「 “…I….For Onii-sama――”」

Why do I have to die for Onii-sama? Why did I have to be reborn as a useless character?

My words stutter because of my trembling body.

Do I really not hate Gil-sama?

Was I really praying for Gil-sama’s happiness from the bottom of my heart?

Do I really…Want to die for Gil-sama’s sake?

I don’t need to think about the answers to my questions.

In truth, I――

「 “Your heart is unbelievably ugly. You even fake your own desires, ridicule everything, and even sink to your own jealousy. She’s a fool for trying to give birth to her only daughter. She even risked losing her life just because of you. And I hate you so much I could kill you because of it.”」

Otou-sama looked down at 【Me】 with those bronze colored eyes that were very similar to 【Olga】’s, as he coldly spat those words to me.

==========================================

Spoiler for Chapter 5-part1:

I tried to resist, but my thigh-held down by his legs wouldn’t budge an inch, and my upper body wouldn’t leave the ground with my hands guarding my neck.

As I put more weight on myself to try to move, the voice above me let out a sigh.

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translations

Chapter 4 – Those who confess – Part 2

「“If it were known that the head mage that protects this country had been replaced by a mediocre sorcerer, this country would be finished. I’ve heard of cases where the magic stones have been successfully destroyed. I don’t know what the situation is now, but if my existence can serve as a deterrent for even a little while longer―” 」

「“That’s quite enough, stop fooling yourself already. ”」

Cold, like the lights in the room have been blown out― that’s how the voice sounds like after interrupting my desperate plea for help.

My heart pounded loudly.

The air felt like that time I was asked what kind of training I had given to Gil-sama. That time, the air had clearly changed.

「”You certainly have a point. The sorcerer’s mirror(no clue), the key to protecting the country. What a well thought and clever reply, but it’s not the truth is it?”」

He lifted my chin and forced me to look at him, and in turn his bronze-colored eyes looked into my face closely.

His lips twisted in an unsightly expression, as if all of otou-sama’s expressions earlier were fake.

No way, I’m scared.

He noticed my body, which was stricken with fear, tried to move out of his grasp, and held my jaw in place tighter.

The kind of hold that says, “I’m only using one hand, but I’m not going to let you get away with a single step, not even for a second”.

Those bronze colored eyes―like【Olga】’s  eyes, their colors intensify, as if accusing me who is reflected in them.

「“I have a question for you, why would you cast a healing spell for that Harvester kid back then?”」

His sudden interrogation caught me off guard.

Why would he suddenly want to ask about this here and now, but noticing me being distracted by my thoughts, I am brought back by the pain as he forcefully tightens his hold on my jaw.

「”……He’s my friend, so of course I would want to help him.”」

Yes, because we are friends…

And he is an irreplaceable shield that will protect Gil-sama.

In that situation, given how this story was unfolding, the priority should not be me, but Atlas.

Besides, my death will  not be in vain if he survives long enough before I die.

「”I’ve read the reports. No matter how muddleheaded you were at the time, you knew that under any circumstances, healing him would make you suffer longer instead.”」

「”But still, the chances for him to survive is more likely.(than leaving him untreated)”」

And in the end, the omniscient one, the plot, did not permit me nor Atlas to die.

I supposed they(plot and god) have deemed us essential for Gil-sama’s future growth.

I might have broken my 【Vessel】, but the atrocities I have committed so far still makes me a villain.

The story continued to develop, progressing to its rightful conclusion, without abandoning me.

「”Isn’t that just your hypocrisy talking?”」

「”….eh?”」

「”One more thing, have you ever considered the people here as humans?”」

Those bronze-colored eyes that gazed down at me closely have a terribly dark hue to them.

I’ve only ever seen such dark color in the battlefield, but I don’t have any explanation as to why otou-sama, who has never shown any speck of interest in me, should look at me this way.

Furthermore, “did I consider the people here as humans?”

「”I don’t understand what you mean”」

「”Just like what I said. I’m asking you, if you even recognized the people around you as living, breathing human beings with a will of their own.”」

「”Of course I did….”」

I’m not lying.

Otou-sama suddenly sent me flying after I uttered those words.

I confusedly tried to steady my staggering body to stand up and turned, only to face a towering body larger than mine, emitting an intimidating rage.

Why would otou-sama suddenly get angry?

Why would he suddenly talk down to me like this?

Of course they’re humans―― just humans, with a supporting role.

What more recognition do they need?

「”I think you are the most repulsive existence I have ever met in this world. You act like you know everything and don’t open up to anyone. You don’t trust anyone, you look down on everything and you believe that your way is the truth. Your stupidity is making me retch.”」

“Even now, you still haven’t changed from when you were a child” he scoffs, roughly grabbing my hair and walking away.

I let out a small cry, my face contorting from the pain, but instead of loosening his hand, he instead pulled my hair hard and slammed me to the floor.

The tears distort my vision.

My rust colored hair blocks my vision further.

As I reached out to cling to something, my hand touched a hard wooden leg, and I hurriedly grabbed it and raised myself upward as if I were dragging my body.

Even in my distorted state, I recognized what leg it was―― and my heart suddenly went cold.

Before I knew it, I was being taken into the bedroom.

_(:3」∠) should I do the 3rd part or disappear again for a few weeks wwwwww jk i’m doing it now.

Spoilers for Part 3:

I was afraid of being exposed, huh.

He who has accurately read the【Me】who is wearing a body called 【Olga】is frightening.

Facing the fact that I can’t even play the role of being the “Hellfire Princess” is making me fearful as well.

I didn’t really care nor concern myself with the sorcerers like【Olga】.

Did not truly trust the members of my clan.

Nor have I wholeheartedly stayed loyal to His Highness.

But.

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teaser translations

_(:3」∠) Chapter 4 Part 2 teaser

「“I have a question for you, why would you cast a healing spell for that Harvester kid back then?”」

His sudden interrogation caught me off guard.

Why would he suddenly want to ask about this here and now, but noticing me being distracted by my thoughts, I am brought back by the pain as he forcefully tightens his hold on my jaw.

「”……He’s my friend, so of course I would want to help him.”」

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Chapter 4 – Those who confess – Part 1

I’m too lazy to link things so here’s the chapter: Watch me die again for more weeks. Thanks for reading~

「“All that is required of me now would be to produce a strong sorcerer. However… I can’t bear one.”」

Even if the child is a product of an incestuous relationship, such taboo will just be disregarded in this clan that only seeks power.

If I had simply lost my magical abilities, that taboo would be broken without question.

However, the doctor had already diagnosed that I could not produce any sorcerers―― That’s right, no matter how much they demand I have one, I could never bear any. 

If the child is just a regular human, then there’s no point in raising it.

The same thing that happened with Gil-sama will be repeated, and it will be useless for the clan. (Gil having water affinity instead of fire affinity)

I glare at Otou-sama, while he let out a sigh, acting like he doesn’t know anything.

「“They know about your condition, and even if they know you’re incapable of producing a sorcerer, they still can’t give up and waste your talents. It’s laughable really.”」

Based on his words, what would people say when they visit this remote place?

But no matter how many times they try, it will just be a waste of time.

And since【Olga】never bore any child until she died, no matter how long 【My】lifespan is extended, me bringing another life into this world will be impossible.

If the other characters are still alive even after the villain dies, it’s still within the plot’s expectations. However, this isn’t the case with me.

「“Now then, what do we do now?  You can resist if you want, but you’ll just needlessly get hurt. I’ll continue coming here for a while, so it would be better for you if we start off peacefully.”」

「“…..”」

“The day hasn’t ended yet” is what Otou-sama said, while shrugging his shoulders and looking at me as if what he said is nothing.

No matter how I resist, no matter how I reject him, this mansion cannot be locked from the inside. (like, she can’t lock him out in the future cause the lock is outside, not on her side)

If not today, how long can I continue to refuse this person who will visit me tomorrow, the next day, a week, a month, every day?

How on earth could I, a person who is nowhere near this person in size, strength, or even magic resist him―― 

…..Thinking ahead, it’s better to conserve as much energy as possible.

If you can’t refuse, then just take the better choice.

I lowered my eyes and muttered an acknowledgement that I understood, and without saying a word, otou-sama pulled my hand and made me stand up.

One step is all it takes for our bodies to touch.

A terrible disgust gushes from within me now that I come face to face with what’s ahead of me.

「“I readied myself for this path, so I will do what I can to stay alive as long as possible, even just a second more. That’s why… I can’t stop now.”」

There’s no other way out.

I just need to buy enough time for Gil-sama to visit me, even if it’s days away.

I grasp my shaking hands tightly and bite my lips.

It’s going to be okay.

I just have to bear with it for tonight.

Once I experience it, I will probably not feel anything else.

「“For what? This isn’t like you. Why would you want a life where you’re forced to have a relationship with your own father? ”」

His tone does not have any of the interest he showed before and sounded like it was purely asking. 

If it was the【Olga】of the past, as she was in the original story, she would not tolerate being placed in a situation where she will be ridiculed like this.

Even if the events have greatly deviated from the original story, she would rather face the battlefield unaided instead of this life.

But, I am.

「“If I were to die now, the situation would be tilted. The education system has been reviewed. The results have been more than satisfactory. But in the end, there was no talent outstanding enough to succeed me.”」

The words that smoothly came out of my mouth are not lies.

Despite my meddling in educating the children, the results are not what I hoped them to be. 

I was expecting a great amount of sorcerers, even on par with 【Olga】.

I thought they would be able to help Gil-sama in the future, when he would become the hero that saves this country, but in the end, even if they were able to improve, I am not satisfied with their results.

It was no wonder that Atlas had given up his title as a member of the magic family.

I guess the decline of the existence of sorcerers itself is already set in stone.

See spoiler for next part here

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Chapter 3 – She who wished to be happy – Part 3

**Hi, will be changing Origa, [my] Father, [my] Mother, and [my] Brother to : Olga, Otou-sama, Okaa-sama and Onii-sama from here onwards ^^ Also this is a work in progress as you can see, just posting this and editting later as I finish the last parts. Enjoy! Sorry for the delay, I’ll no longer do any puzzles cause my mind is already being overheated as it is :v Editting is done!**

Being a child of a mage known to be the strongest of them all, it is only natural to expect the same path from him.

In fact, for one to be a talented person, one must be birthed from another talented person, as proven by blood lines. Unless they have reached a certain end for some reasons, 

And it’s not like they don’t have the ability to try and keep producing a child, as they wished for it to be stronger than the last.

While the king took advantage of their wishes and instigated them more.

「 Eventually, after being pressured by the royal family, she* had to give birth to you…… She was still happy despite it all.」

*apparently あの子 is a term of endearment, and not actually a child in this case lol gomen, will be editting the last chapters after i actually finish this one

Okaa-sama’s body was terribly weak. Her lifeforce must have been decreased a lot after giving birth to me.

But if his daughter is still incompetent, then he would not want another one, was what Otou-sama had said.

However, the child that was born had an overflowing mana that broke their scales, and the intellect she has is unusual for her age―― Of course, the clan was overjoyed, and approached Okaa-sama with the intent for her to bear another one.

「If only you were a little bit more incompetent than that Guilford, we wouldn’t need him. We wouldn’t need another one too. You really are a troublesome child.」

「……I still have no idea why I took over instead of Onii-sama.」

As if wondering why I still did not understand, Otou-sama laughed.

「It’s simple, really. “The little sister has powers. So the brother must have the same ability, but has yet to awaken it.” Do you really not believe the elders will not have that line of thinking?」

However, Gil-sama just used his powers to feed himself, knowing he would not awaken the same powers as us. But because of my birth, Gil-sama’s poor but happy and carefree life has become twisted.

It really is my fault.

……No, this is what should happen in the original.

Everything is happening just as planned, to be【Olga】’s background story.

That’s why the story has gone haywire because of【 me 】. However, an uncomfortable feeling in the pit of my stomach has begun to make itself known to the point that I can no longer ignore it.

「Okaa-sama…… knew as well?」

It was all for Okaa-sama, is what he said.

But that gentle person did those things, even though she wished for my happiness. They used Gil-sama

To think they felt so burdened by Olga― by me― that he even used another child.

「It might not be her who told you, but you’ve already noticed right?」

Using and tormenting a little child just to prolong her life.

The Okaa-sama I saw in my memories, who always gives me a gentle smile, is being distorted.

The mother* who used to visit【me】, who smiles at me, who encourages me, and the mother who never showed her face in her last days, has her face now shrouded in fog, no longer visible to me.

Aah, in the end, Okaa-sama’s the same as them towards me too huh.

(*she switched from calling her Okaa-sama(my mom) to just calling her Hahaoya(a mother))

「You are all so selfish…」

Otou-sama chuckled silently, as if mocking the words coming from me and said “I don’t want to hear it from you, who has been living as she pleases”

Clenching my fists till they turn white, my eyelids heat up and the back of my throat becomes hot. However, the hateful words I want to say got stuck in the back of my throat and never came out.

And then suddenly, Otou-sama, who hasn’t uttered a single word, stood up and extinguished one of the candlesticks.

The light source we have is limited in this enclosed room, so just putting out one of them makes the room much darker.

Right now, I can’t even light one of those candlesticks by myself, so I wonder what he’s planning to do.

But before I could ask what he’s up to, a low voice slowly filled the room.

「Now that the sun has set, let’s get down to business.」

(to defeat, the huns–i’m sorry)。

Business huh.

The real reason why Otou-sama even came to this place.

But based on the conversation earlier, I already understood what it’s about.

In any case, there is no good reason for why this person is visiting me now.

Because they are the kind of people who live their lives using others for their own sake.

What would he do if he heard that his daughter, who was no longer able to use magic, was being kept in captivity?

「For what reason did Keika guide you here? Is it to kill me?」

「There’s no way your little attendant could have done all of this by herself.」

Upon asking him in such a desperate voice, he mockingly said “You’re dumber than I thought.”.

Waving his finger and putting out another candlestick, he said that the surveillance in this dilapidated house is very strict.

As the lights in the room gradually dimmed, Otou-sama lowered his voice to talk, as if he was revealing a secret.

「Right now, this clan is divided between those who want you dead, and those who want to keep you alive. I got a request from one of them.」

How foolish. When the thought came that it was the faction who wanted me dead, a sneer appeared from my downcast face.

No matter how hard they try, the characters will never understand. That I am the villain, the hero’s counterpart.

Unlike the nameless ones, my death is already 【set】and the hero will always be the harbinger.

No matter what I do, I will survive, like what happened to the battlefield. Until the day Gil-sama slays me himself.

But father looked and smiled at me, and took the conversation in another direction

Your doctor has already made a diagnosis, and well, “you’ll never know unless you try” is what they’re thinking」

As I recall――”my vessel was beyond repair” was what the doctor had diagnosed.

Meaning, all my value and role as a sorcerer has been lost.

I can understand if they weren’t willing to believe the diagnosis and ask for a second opinion but―― “you’ll never know unless you try?”

With suspicions, I look up at Otou-sama with questions written on my face, however, he smiled sweetly and said in a low voice:

「They told me to stay here until tomorrow morning――you know what that means, right?」

A doctor’s diagnosis

Trying to see how everything will work out.

Those words from the caretakers

A remote and dilapidated place where no one goes.

Until tomorrow morning comes, no one will come here.

A room that is gradually getting darker.

A man, closing in.

「You can refuse all you want, however, do you think you can reject me now?」

A beautiful face that resembles my own, lips so charming that it makes resistance futile.

Those words, their meaning, is giving me goosebumps.

special thanks to Jisho.org for helping me translate everything and making me learn jp easier! now let me go disappear again for xx months—-

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translations

Chapter 3 – She who wished to be happy – Part 2

「…….All this time, I’ve been wondering.」

I tried reading his face while I organized my thoughts carefully. Seeing me like this however, father just smirked and chuckled, which urged me to continue. 

「”Why did you bring my older brother to this family?”」

Hearing those words, a flicker of surprise flashed in father’s eyes. Seeing that, my heart skipped a beat.

That’s right.

A mage’s prowess must be trained in one’s childhood. So in the first place, he should be the first person to know that Gil-sama’s affinity with fire magic is nonexistent.

And also, even if the possibility is low, if a child is born with fire affinity, the Luzilles will take action and claim the child as their own.

With the way Gil-sama was, there is no doubt that he would not have been accepted if it was proven that he has no affinity for fire magict. But despite being the case, he was accepted to the family for as long as I gained my memories back. And it would have been too late to start honing his powers as a water mage at that point.

「”…..Is that all you want to know?”」

「”Yes”」

Regardless of what I will come to know of now, I won’t be able to do anything anyway. 

By being born as Origa, I became the mastermind behind everything.

Thinking about it, the only thing I didn’t come to know about is the incidents that surrounded the Hero. In any case, it was already predetermined that my future is to be killed by Gil-sama. Death shall no longer be a regret if I were to learn everything I didn’t get a chance to in my former life.

Nodding and pondering what to say, father’s contenance switched to that of uneasiness and frowned. Then, with the same emotionless face I once saw, muttered:

「”If only you weren’t born, I wouldn’t have taken ‘that’ to this family.”」

I’m very sorry.

Father looked like he was deep in thought and continued to weave his words together.

「”I knew that her body was very frail. She too, experienced the same thing as you in your age, falling into a terrible situation.”」

I once heard that Father worked as Mother’s vassal back in the imperial castle.

Mother’s body had always been frail, even from before. However, this is the first time I’ve heard that she also fell in the same precarious state as me.

「”She shouldn’t expect a child in such a state, nor did anyone expect her to. But she…Her relationship with His Majesty is not good, and without considering all these, she was forced to be married off.”」

Unaware of everything else, he continued to weave the tale which is all news to me, with him not noticing the endearing way he calls my mother. His nostalgic words doesn’t seem to match his character, with his affections oozing out 

「”She should not bear a child, therefore I worked hard to raise my merits and gained more achievements, and wished for her hand in marriage.”」

In order for a vassal to ask a princess’s hand in marriage, a great deal of achievements is necessary. So in order to help mother, father defeated the then head of Luzille and became its leader, and led the clan to the battlefield as a mage. (*since the father is a knight, and not a mage)

I, no, every mage knows of my father’s achievements.

He fought enough battles to be called the strongest mage; he revived the dying military front, and he managed to gain a ceasefire from the other camp.

All for the sake of saving my mother.

There was no mention of this in the original story..

「“I was sure father and mother were in a political marriage.”」

「“Aah, it’s foolish to expect love in our situation.  Neither that child nor I harbour any romantic feelings for each other. I would be happy for her, regardless of who she marries.”」

Such words coming from his mouth that sounded like “Since that child has no other supporters other than me at that time, I became the most suitable one for her” was abruptly cut short.

「”I too wanted to have a child, and besides, it was also my duty to have one. So I had an affair with another woman and have her give birth to it but… it didn’t go as smoothly as I had hoped.”」

And the result of that affair is a mage lacking in fire affinity, Guilford.

Edit: I guess the NU link is not linking to the flyleaf page to stop the aggregators from copying this chapter, oh well. Just gonna reiterate what I said in that page.
Since I have stopped studying japanese grammar, the translation of this chapter may seem awkward. For that, I appreciate any comments on translation mistakes I may have had on this chapter. Let’s learn all together!