Chapter 4 – Those who confess – Part 3

Did you expect me posting this chapter 3 days in a row? did ya? huh? I didn’t 😀 Enjoy~ I might be gone again for a few weeks if my motivation to translate the next part dwindles.

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「 “Did you enjoy yourself? Trampling on everyone, not caring nor trusting them, and shutting yourself off? Did you enjoy your tragic little play and your role? My tragic heroine of a daughter?”」

I faced the direction where the voice was coming from, and saw otou-sama just standing there, with an expressionless face.

Was I really stupid?

Did I really act like a tragic heroine?

What the hell is he even talking about?

My mind screams out protests and resistance, and my whole body begins to tremble.

I don’t fear being violated, what I fear the most is being stared at by those bronze-colored eyes resembling mine―― but, why?

「 “You weren’t working for the sake of the sorcerers, you were just deluding yourself while satisfying your desires. That has always been the reason right?”」

I was afraid of being exposed, huh.

He who has accurately read the【Me】who is wearing a body called 【Olga】is frightening.

Facing the fact that I can’t even play the role of being the “Hellfire Princess” is making me fearful as well.

I didn’t really care nor concern myself with the sorcerers like【Olga】.

I did not truly trust the members of my clan.

Nor have I wholeheartedly stayed loyal to His Highness.

But.

「 “Tell me, you’ve never truly seen these people as humans――  have you?”」

Not caring about how many perishes.

Not caring how many cry.

Not caring how many fall to despair.

It doesn’t concern me.

Because that’s the role you all play in this story.

They aren’t humans―― They are simply characters in this story.

「 “The only person in your eyes and heart is Guilford. You don’t even acknowledge the existence of that Harvester kid whom you call your friend.”」

And what’s wrong with that?

What’s wrong with putting Gil-sama as my priority before the citizens of this country? the sorcerers? the members of the clan? Or my friends? or myself ?

What’s wrong with putting Gil-sama on a pedestal and making him my priority? Nothing matters more. Even the citizens of this country, or the sorcerers, or my friends, and especially myself. Nothing.

The refutes I have been holding back inside my mind began to move my mouth, as if to scold my trembling body.

Although reason dictates that I do not agree with what he said, I couldn’t help but be swayed by my emotions.

「 “…..That’s right. Yes, I love Onii-sama. I respect him, I adore him, I want to give him all the happiness in this world and I will do whatever it takes to provide him with such. I could care less about what happens to anyone else. As long as he’s happy. So what’s wrong with that? Could you blame me? I don’t care how much I needed to sacrifice, all of it has nothing to do with me. Everything and everyone else in this world exists only for my Onii-sama! ”」

Yes, they have to be.

「 “Why are you so obsessed with him?”」

――Because I have to be.

「 “You’re a pure liar at every turn aren’t you?”」

I’m not lying.

What I said is the truth.

The novel――The story, everything. They all exist for Gil-sama and Gil-sama alone.

The children, adults, the men and women, the sorcerers and regular citizens, supporting characters, the villains, and even me.

We all are characters that exist solely for Gil-sama.

「 “If only you had meant what you just said, I wouldn’t have said anything and would have given you an applause.”」

「 “……..”」

I mean it. Every word of it.

That’s all I have been thinking.

The story about Gil-sama’s growth, saving his country and the liberation of the sorcerers.

I’ve always loved this story, and I’ve always been the only character who loved Gil-sama the most.

「 “You? Wanting to protect Guilford? Don’t make me laugh. I know your gaze towards him is not one of brotherly love you claim to have. Did you try looking at yourself in the mirror with that gaze? Your――”」

I love him.

The absolute main ^hero character.^{(yeah, i don’t know how to do those text on top like the japanese one.)}

The knight in shining armor.^{(original text said 正義の味方を-seigi no mikata wo,  but i don’t want this to have the Shirou from FSN feel lol)}

An existence to be admired for.

The only one who encouraged and gave hope to the me who is lying sickly on a hospital bed waiting to die. The only reason for that “me”, to be happy.

The only existence that made me feel like I wasn’t alone.

「 “…Stop…it..”」

But that’s how I always thought of it.

I’m not a villain, I don’t want to be hated and excluded by everyone. 

The truth is――

「 “You actually hate Guilford more than anyone, don’t you.”」^{(Ngl im crying as i type that line.)}

I wanted to be Onii ^{the hero} sama.

「 “…You’re…wrong..”」

No one cared for me, no one did anything for me. The only person I longed for was Gil-sama, even as I was dying alone in the hospital bed.

I wanted to be the one to think of my friends, my country. And more than that, I wanted to be the one to be loved and cared for by many people, who can laugh and cry freely, one who can freely play without care, and lastly, become the hero for everyone.

The hero of the story, ever so brightly shining.

A person, more important than everyone. ^{(lol poor king)}

「 “…You’re…wrong..That’s not….Onii-sama――”」

And yet,

Why do I have to be born as a villain?

Why do I have to be the one who can’t protect her loved ones?

Why do I have to be in a role where everyone hates me?

And yet, why do I have to love this story so much?

「 “…I….For Onii-sama――”」

Why do I have to die for Onii-sama? Why did I have to be reborn as a useless character?

My words stutter because of my trembling body.

Do I really not hate Gil-sama?

Was I really praying for Gil-sama’s happiness from the bottom of my heart?

Do I really…Want to die for Gil-sama’s sake?

I don’t need to think about the answers to my questions.

In truth, I――

「 “Your heart is unbelievably ugly. You even fake your own desires, ridicule everything, and even sink to your own jealousy. She’s a fool for trying to give birth to her only daughter. She even risked losing her life just because of you. And I hate you so much I could kill you because of it.”」

Otou-sama looked down at 【Me】 with those bronze colored eyes that were very similar to 【Olga】’s, as he coldly spat those words to me.

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Spoiler for Chapter 5-part1:

I tried to resist, but my thigh-held down by his legs wouldn’t budge an inch, and my upper body wouldn’t leave the ground with my hands guarding my neck.

As I put more weight on myself to try to move, the voice above me let out a sigh.